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OK, so a bit of a confession here. The title of this blog is a little mis-named. In reality it’s about self- rather than time-management. Time doesn’t care who we are or what we do, our priorities, our pressures, or our obligations. Time, well, it just is. How we manage the time we have, however, is very much up to us. So, what are some of the most valuable ‘self-management’ tips I’ve come across when coaching on time management? 1. Understand what you’re good at and not good at. What we’re good at we tend to enjoy more and be more efficient and productive at. Give a priority to doing what you’re good at and, if you can, find others to do what you’re not so good at and not so efficient at doing. 2. The stuff you don’t want to do but you have to do get on to it first and as part of a routine or habit. For example, maybe 7.30am-8.30am is your email clearing time, or maybe you hate doing the dishes so either a) get a dishwasher (some of us call them ‘children’; it’s not easy to get them to do stuff I know but that’s part of parenting – you get to have revenge when they have children) or b) get on to them fairly soon after you’ve eaten. Remember delaying the time we take to do the mundane just places that time demand somewhere else and creates a sense of non-achievement (because it’s stuff still waiting to be done). Even if we don’t finish the task at least we have started it and often that start is enough to make it that bit easier to complete or pick it up again later. The key here is about making progress. Bits of progress lead to completion and give a sense of moving forward rather than avoidance (it’s still avoidance, but a kinder type of avoidance). 3. Make a meeting with yourself – regularly. This is your time, maybe to catch up on things, maybe to make some phone calls you need to, maybe to go for a walk or run, maybe to think and reflect, maybe to plan and prepare. Whatever the reason, we don’t like to break a meeting we have made with others so why shouldn’t we use the same sense of respect and courtesy on ourselves? 4. Let go of trying to find more time. You cannot make more time, or find more time. We can only change how we use it. Identify what’s important to you – family, work, health, relationships, interests and hobbies. At the start of each day plan to do at least one thing that contributes to each and prioritise it. Maybe it’s a kiss, maybe a thank you, maybe a smile, maybe some time with others, maybe a phone call or text, maybe some new learning. Whatever it is it means that at least part of each day is you working on making your day great and, in some way, your own rather than someone else’s. 5. When stuff starts to build up learn to use the quadruple D’s. Do, delegate, delay, or drop. Enough said. Not everything is critical or needs your involvement in it even if you want to be. Need to do and want to do are related, but not the same thing. 6. Get a diary. Whether you’re a list person or not, organised or disorganised, old or young, old school (paper diary) or electronic (phone app or computer program) don’t rely on memory alone. Memory may give a sense of freedom and a diary may create a sense of impending obligations but the former is one of blissful ignorance while the later ensures we stay on top of what we need to do, with who, when, where, and why. We only have so much working memory so why not use a pen and paper (or digital assistant) to lend a hand. 7. If you have a diary make sure you use it EFFECTIVELY. A diary replaces your short-term memory but like baking a cake it’s only as nice as the ingredients you put in it. What’s more the ingredients need to go in to the cake in the right order. The most important stuff (not what others think is important but that is important to you because it gives you energy or will save you time later on) goes in the cake [and is prioritised in the diary] first. Plan ahead. Sets tasks, meetings, activities. Colour code it if you need to (colour assists our brain’s ability to quick scan, assess and self-organise). Also, not forgetting, the very important ability to look back and check what we’ve accomplished, re-organise our short-term (next day) future, and then put that diary aside. 8. Try not to obsess about stuff you didn’t get around to today, especially if you tend to lose sleep a bit over that kind of thing. It usually means one of three things: a) we messed around a bit and chose to spend some of our time earlier less effectively than we could have; we chose a delayed consequence or realised what we had to do was not as important as it was in reality, b) we were working on what was important for someone else at the expense of our own tasks, or c) Murphy’s Law came along and we need to acknowledge that, look at what we intended to do and re-organise/re-inform those original timelines. 9. Respect what you miss doing and prioritise doing more of it in the future. We let things go we used to enjoy and the consequence is we add to our load/commitments without any commensurate increase in our performance and/or productivity. Any organism can only take so much load before it squeezes itself dry (figuratively speaking). Often we tell ourselves we keep taking on board more responsibility and tasks because we’ll let others down who have expectations of us. In reality what we’ve done is develop a habit of putting others first. This is noble and admirable but too much of this means we run on empty and before we know it we start to resent all that we have on our plate, and lose our mojo for what we are doing. We choose what we have on our plate; no one else does. 10. Only ever plan to use no more than 80% of the time you have. The other 20% isn’t wasted. It’s there for Murphy’s Law to arrive in a blaze of trumpets. It’s there for the meetings that go over time, and the telephone calls that take ages, and the emails that take longer than anticipated to write. It’s the elastic in your day.
There are some roles within society that create a genuine challenge around what we share with those we love when we go home at the end of our day or shift. No matter the challenges we face in our working day the opportunity to share, debrief, dialogue and reflect on what we have encountered and experienced can be incredibly valuable. However, sometimes the stuff we want to talk about isn’t the stuff we want our family to know about in depth, or maybe we do want to share but we do not want to say or how to say it, and are also worried about the impact what we have encountered might have and whether it will be interpreted the way we intended it to be. Sometimes we may just want to talk and share, without a response. At other times we’ll not want to share at all, wanting to reflect on our own and in our own way, or simply put a day behind us and move forward to spending time with our families. No matter our needs, some occupations encounter this more than others – Nurses, Medical doctors, Social Workers, Ambulance Officers, Police Officers to name a few. Those of us who work in emergency response fields, as an example, absorb what comes at us in our day as part of that day and it’s not always the kind of stuff we want to or feel comfortable sharing at home – although a little bit of sharing in the right way is usually quite healthy. Strategies to manage this challenge vary, and need to be flexible enough to adapt to changing needs and demands we are faced with. Sometimes we put up pretty clear boundaries, at other times we wear our day on our face and body language when we walk in the front door of home, at other times we are quite open, and most of us are somewhere inbetween. There some useful strategies to manage this, however, and these can be very handy when we find ourselves in situations more trying and personally impacting than we are used to that others can be curious about. 1) At the end of the day, before we get home or once we get home, deliberately take steps to change our mood state. What this means is undertaking an activity or action that alters what we are thinking about or feeling – and deliberately creating a moment to do so. It might be a distraction, or a hobby, or even watching something on Youtube or Vimeo that always makes you laugh, listening to a podcast or listening to music. This is about creating a separation in mood between then and now that enables you to a) engage in a different way between work and home (if you wish to), and b) allow a moment to evaluate if you need something a bit more to create the desired separation between work and home (e.g. a little more time to yourself, a sit down with your partner or a colleague, or some tasks you need to address before you can start to genuinely leave the work day behind as best you can). 2) Use physical activity to engage in a familiar routine that enables you to shift the hormones in your body. In a word, some type of exercise. That doesn’t have to be something strenuous - it could be gardening, taking the dog for a walk if we have one, or playing with children (great chance to be mobile, move and let out our inner). The scientific evidence behind the role physical activity plays in shifting mood state is pretty compelling. 3) If we have a need to share give some thought to the right space and way we wish to do it. Some forethought can be helpful on this. What are the signs in ourselves that mean we know we need to share something? (By golly have I got to tell someone this!) How do we want to share that? (And how do I share responsibly pending my professional role and who the people are I have chosen to share with). What do we want the response to be (listen, advice, understand etc)? What role do those we are sharing with play (just listen, empathise, generate solutions, agree and validate)? Thinking about this in advance can be very helpful to shape what we want to share and how we do it, and also clarify what we need from them in that moment (even if only to ourselves). 4) Have a think earlier rather than later around what belongs at work no matter how I feel, and what can I bring home. This ‘due diligence’ process can really help when we feel caught out and start talking about something we start sharing but wish we hadn’t in hindsight, often with good intentions but the moment runs away with us. If we think ahead in advance it’s often easier to know where our boundaries are and we feel more confident and ready to share what we have already decided we want to, and our family can play a constructive supportive and valuable role in our wellbeing and problem solving. 5) Managing prying curiosity. If you don’t want to share but friends and family want you to that can also be difficult. The motivation is often to be supportive and to seek to understand what you have experienced, but sometimes that can create pressure and curiosity we didn’t anticipate. At times like this we can simply choose to not share and often that can work but sometimes it’s not well understood and our support team at home can be more persistent than we anticipated. A good strategy at times like this is to think in advance about what you want to and can share, keep it short and simple, be grateful for their interest and leave it at that. You’re not being rude, you’re just keeping it simple with little chance for expansion.
It is a rare person involved in selling a product or service that doesn’t at some stage feel nervous or worried about the outcome of a pitch or presentation, client meeting, explanation of what we can do for you, or effective delivery of a product to a customer. A certain level of anxiety is normal and desirable, because it is essential for both learning and performance. Too much and we cannot function, but too little and we do not care if we function well or not. With the former we focus on what can go wrong, whereas with the latter we simply assume it will go right and are not engaged in the outcome. Every now and then I deal with - as a coach and trainer - people in sales and business who exhibit an uncomfortable level of anxiety that negatively impacts their confidence and ability to perform and get results. This often has a corresponding impact on the satisfaction they have in their role, their career choice, and can tend to spiral a bit as they remember what they did wrong (or maybe could have done better) rather than what they did well. After all if we only focus on building our weaknesses we’ll only ever have strong (or improving) weaknesses and weak strengths. This is one of the keys to being successful in sales - find out what you are good at and master it. Are you great on the telephone? Then work on your telephone contact plan and cold call routines. Are you a relationship-builder? Then work in an area that rewards getting to know and genuinely build a relationship with key individuals. Are you great with systems and a linear thinker? Then work in an area that has clear systems and a defined step by step sales process. Sales anxiety manifests itself in two broad clusters of experience – emotional and behavioural. Emotional reactions to sales rejection are typified by anxiety when the phones goes, often worrying that a client (not a specific client but clients in general) is calling to complain, taking the loss of a client or failure to close a deal as a personal comment on ones self-worth, or a heightened level of self-consciousness about what clients and colleagues think of you professionally. Behavioural reactions to sales rejection are typified by avoidance, procrastination, and relief that common experiences anticipated as being problematic are over. What are some of the ways we can manage and/or minimise these challenges which are very normal for many people? Well, in addition to the items mentioned above - finding out what type of sales you are good at and do that – here are 10 useful tips. 1) Remind yourself that every point of contact, whether it results in a sale or not, is an opportunity to make a positive impression and an opportunity to build your company’s and your individual brand. Maybe it was a professional service, a pleasant smile, the way you engaged, or being willing to reschedule. Maybe it was knowing your limits or why you could not help someone. It all adds up to a positive impression and a greater likelihood of passing that impression on to other potential customers, or coming back to you if things with an existing supplier go wrong. 2) Prepare. Know the company - be they an existing client or a prospect - the market and, if possible, the individual customer (as best you can). Research web sites and make sure you’re abreast of the business section in the newspaper for a start. Find out what’s going on in that company or for that company in the market. What are the challenges they face and why are they challenges? Ask questions relevant to needs and how the product is intending to be used so you can provide advice and information. This all helps build a conversation, inquire, and identify what is important. 3) Sell a solution, not a product. Products are a dime a dozen, solutions are not. Identify the way in which working with you can be easy, understands identified needs, is consistent with the values the client holds dear, recognises the current problem in the eyes of the customer alongside their desired alternative, and is responsive to situations as they arise. Remember, convenience and emotion sells more product than anything else. 4) Develop a means of building personal armour and the principle of depersonalisation. It can be very easy to take things personally (I know I do but that’s one of the reasons why I work hard for my clients – their challenges matter to me) but at the end of the day we need to find a balance between caring and caring too much. Remember, a decision to reject a pitch can mean a number of things, not all of whom are bad or a negative reflection on yourself. Perhaps the timing is wrong, perhaps the pitch was not quite as good as the best one (but also much better than the worst one), perhaps those you’re talking with are not the decision-makers, or perhaps they’re just exploring the market. Whatever the reason there are plenty of reasons why rejection is not about you and about other things. If in doubt about all of this - see point Number 1 above. 5) Focus on what you can control. Preparation, research, product knowledge, and follow up. Remember, selling is like holding out your hand for someone to shake it. Whether they take it is up to them but whether they do or not you’ve done what you can do. 6) Work hard to never be late. Why add stress trying to find a park or get through traffic unnecessarily. Others may keep you waiting, and this can happen for various reasons but show you respect their time by how you manage yours. 7) Schedule your week. When’s the best time to meet with clients, make phone calls, design presentations, create material? Schedule them when they suit you and when you’re at your best. And when you need to do things not at your best how can you best schedule preparation, self-talk, and logistics? That way you’re showing your client your best when you’re in contact with them whether it be by email, telephone or face to face. 8) Follow up, always. Even if it’s simply a thank you. People remember that, and that you valued their time. Time is the one thing we cannot replace in our day and we should respect it. 9) Test and measure processes and be clear on what adds value. What works and what doesn’t work in terms of getting a sale? Do we really understand our market and what they need or want? If we don’t test and measure then how do we know where to spend our time, energy and resources? If we only measure sales completed then in what way do we understand conversion, enhance relationship building, and retain repeat customers? 10) After a tough day or challenging process, debrief. Catch up with a mentor, colleagues, your line manager and debrief. What worked? What didn’t go according to plan? What did you come across that was new? What did you have a chance to practice? What was one way you came away with a positive? And so on. Reflect, don’t ruminate. Put the lessons into the next day, and celebrate the wins along the way.
